Let’s start with a question: Are you good at setting boundaries as an Assistant? Here’s an even more critical question: Are you good at setting boundaries, and do you stick to them?
Setting boundaries is crucial for Assistants for several reasons. We work closely with executives who often have long hours and a deep passion for their work. It’s easy for us to be taken for granted.
We perform our jobs so effectively that our executives may come to expect us to be available all the time, relying on us heavily. But setting boundaries is essential in any relationship—whether personal or professional. So, where do we draw the line? How can Assistants establish the right boundaries, stick to them, and most importantly, communicate them effectively?
As Marie Forleo says:
“Machines are built to work 24/7, but not human beings. It’s crucial that we put boundaries in place for ourselves—to have offline time, exercise, sleep, and spend time with loved ones. This is how we balance being effective and productive while staying healthy and sane.”
Assistants need to set boundaries for their health and mental well-being. Let’s explore how to set and maintain those boundaries in a professional setting.
This template provides you with practical, ready-to-use dialogues tailored for various common scenarios where you might need to refuse a request at work. Equip yourself with the right words to handle difficult conversations gracefully
To truly commit to setting boundaries, you need to understand your “why.” As Simon Sinek suggests, knowing why you do something and why it’s important to you makes it easier to commit to. Your “why” could be family, friends, health, or overall well-being. When your “why” is tied to something that brings you joy, setting boundaries becomes more manageable.
Time is the most obvious place to start. Time is not infinite, and as Assistants, we need to manage it wisely. Establishing boundaries around how and where we spend our time helps us stay focused and accomplish what we set out to do each day.
Start by identifying your non-negotiables. These are the things you prioritize daily. For example, I prioritize quality time with my kids after school, shutting my laptop at 9 PM to spend time with my partner, and making time to read each day. I’m also working on eating better and exercising more.
While conflicts with non-negotiables happen, I strive to stick to these boundaries as much as possible. I also have monthly and yearly non-negotiables, such as taking vacations. What are your non-negotiables? Visualizing these in an “ideal week” structure can help you commit to them.
Equally important is recognizing what you don’t want to spend time on, such as excessive screen time or social media. Setting limits here is just as crucial.
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